once you have kids, and you officially earn the title of Mother your heart changes. you see other children and Mothers and even your own Mother in a different way. A piece of your heart that was always there suddenly becomes awake and well frankly so do you for a lot more hours of the day and night than ever before..part of the induction into the group I suppose. But honestly something just clicks on and your senses are stronger. Your ears hear more, your mind is able to juggle all kinds of things at once. Your ability to love is multiplied. Its actually quite magnificent. God is magnificent in how he provides isn't He!
The past few years though, watching you Paula become a Grandmother I think I have realized that a Grandmothers heart is an even greater level of these things. I watch you with your second set of kids and it is awesome. You know each one so well it often blows my mind. You know their quirks and special gifts. You see each one as unique and marvelous.
It is such a blessing to watch you in this role, to see you long to be with each of them. Your willingness to once again have your sleep interrupted by cries for comfort and love. When Levi was so colicky and would scream for all those hours and hours you were so willing to hold him close and never got frustrated or upset. Your love for them is overwhelming.
My heart aches for you tonight as you are preparing for surgery in the morning. I don't really even know what I am trying to express in these words but I just want you to know that we are all here, your big family of fifteen! We are blessed to have such a beautiful, strong, Godly woman in our lives. I long for you Paula to know that all your kids and grand kids will be holding you up in prayer tomorrow. May your feel strengthened by the love that truly you have grown in each of us. It is because of you and Steve and the legacy that you've built that this family is so strong. Your hands of grace and service extended to each of us. It is a gift.
I love this picture of you and Wes taken the other night at Grandpa's Birthday party. I love his expression, just four months old and already so in love with his Grandmother just as much as the rest of us.
We all love you dearly Paula. May you feel all of our arms around you tomorrow.
xoxo,
Rebekah
1 comment:
Oh, my, Rebekah...what a beautiful picture of family! To say something 'awakes' in a mother's/grandmother's heart is so true. I didn't know of that before I became a mom...and I learned it again...faster and deeper...when I became a grandma!! God overflows our hearts with love and joy and delight and protection with each of these little ones! Oh, how I love them! It does seem like a deeper love this time around...altho I really don't think that is possible! But with this second set of kids, my heart melts....they are awesome!!
Thank you for your strong and loving affirmation of this grandma. You are precious to me and I thank you for so tenderly loving me. Thank you for your prayers! You and Chris and the boys are such a great blessing in our lives. I am in awe of His goodness to us in you all!!
Simon and Levi, grandma and grandpa loved having you come to our house. Wasn't it fun to chase the balloons? And Wesley, you cutie pie, what a nice smile for grandma!! I hope your daddy videos you laughing!! And Evan and Miles, if you're reading this, I so look forward to the day we get you for a visit, too!
Grandma sends big hugs, lots of kisses and love to you all! Thank you again Rebekah, for this sweet blog! I was very blessed by it!
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